Heidi Sand-Hart, Home Keeps Moving, 선교사 자녀들 잦은 이별로 인한 슬픔과 분노에 치유가 필요하다

Heidi Sand-Hart, Home Keeps Moving, McDougal Publishing, 2010

핀란드 어머니와 노르웨이 아버지 사이에서 태어나 부모님의 선교 사역을 따라 영국, 인도, 노르웨이에서 자란 저자의 자기 고백적 성찰을 담고 있다. YWAM 을 통해 본인 또한 인도, 모로코, 태국, 중국 등지에서 사역을 하고 현재는 남편과 함께 영국에서 살고 있다. 자신이 선교사 자녀로서 통과했던 시간들을 -대부분은 여러 책을 참고해서- 성찰하는 자기 고백적이고 자기 치유적인 기록이다. 잦은 이별로 인한 풀어내지 못한 슬픔과 분노가 선교사 자녀들에게 내면의 풀어야 할 이슈라는 지적에 수긍이 갔다. 동료 선교사를 잃은 아픔. 계속 되는 상실과 이별을 경험해 온 자녀들의 마음을 보다 세밀하게 돌보아야겠다. 

"A Thrid Culture Kid (TCK) is a person who has spent a significant part of his or her developmental years outside of the parents' culture. The TCK builds a relationship to all of the cultures, while not having full ownership of any. Although elements from each culture are assimilated into the TCK's life experience, the sense of belonging is in relationship to others of similar background." (Pollock, David C. and Ruth E. Van Reken. 199, Third Culture Kids: Growing Up Among Worlds. Yarmouth, MA, Intercultural Press, p19)

"The TCK awareness that there can be more than one way to look at the same things starts early in life." (Pollock, David C. and Ruth E. Van Reken. 199, Third Culture Kids: Growing Up Among Worlds. Yarmouth, MA, Intercultural Press, p81)

I am completely used to feeling alone in a crowd, even when they are speaking a language that I understand. (62)

"If you come back, you wanted to leave again; if you went away, you longed to come back. Wherever you were, you could hear the call of the homeland, like the note of the herdman's horn far away in the hills. You had one home out there and one over here, and yet you were an alien in both places. Your true abiding place was the vision of something very far off, and your soul was like the waves, always restless, forever in motion." (Cowley, Malcom. 1991. Exiles Return. In An Assessment of Reentry Issues of the Children of Missionaries, ed. Doris L. Walters. New York: Vintage Press, 117-118)

For me, home is found in a variety of places and people. (65)

... I wanted to bring a solution to TCKs struggling to embrace, forgive, let go ot the negative aspects of their upbrinings and, in particular, unresolved grief... All I can do is tell you about my own path to healing, and it is still a work in progress. (73)

I had developed a foolproof method of suppression and clothed myself in an excitement for the next destination.... I managed to push my feelings down. (76)

Unresolved grief is a very real problem for most TCKs. (Pollock, David C. and Ruth E. Van Reken. 199, Third Culture Kids: Growing Up Among Worlds. Yarmouth, MA: Intercultural Press, p167)

Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness, and many of our people need it solely on these accounts Broad, wholesome, charitable views of men and things cannot be acquired by vegetating in one corner of the earth all one's lifetime. Mark Twain